The more I’m around my family the more miserable I am. I try my best to do whatever I can for all of them but yet, the more I try the worse it gets. I’m on the verge of quitting my job, selling my house, and disappearing. As much as it would hurt them, my being gone, I would feel so much better.
People say suicide is a cowardly thing to do, but I’m definitely scared of doing it—so kudos for being able to pull the trigger. People hurt you. Why be around them?
All the shits that has happened to me growing up made me realize things but it didn’t make me go into such a dark abyss. I’m trying my very hardest to right the wrongs but I’m digging a bigger hole. I’m willing to sacrifice everything I have, every last penny for her—it’s still not enough. I should have just never been.